Watch your mouth

“Sticks and Stones may break my bones… but words will never hurt me”

I wonder how many people believed that lie growing up, because I still remember hurtful things people said to me as far back as second grade. The truth of the matter is words hurt. I used to be the type of person that could really fight with words, I knew if I slapped someone that was going to be enough so I would think of the meanest, downright dirtiest comment to say about them to their face because I knew that was gonna stick more than a slap in the mouth was. They would still be thinking about the things I said  from now, as long as it hurt their self-esteem or hit them in their heart hard enough.  (But I’m delivered now, Amen lol)

Now that I am older and doing different things with my life that people do not necessarily agree with, somebody always got something to say. If I mention that I’m joining Peace Corps and moving to Africa, I get an array of negative responses or opinions. “Why do you want to join Peace Corps and live in the middle of nowhere?” “You’re going to be living in a hut with no electricity and no shower?” “You know women in the peace corps get raped?” And I usually respond with a blank stare and say nothing because what I want to say is most likely not a God led Response.

You can choose to give in to the things that people say to you and about you or you can choose to ignore it because whatever someone says about you or whatever they say negative to you is a reflection of what’s inside of their heart and how they feel about themselves. That old saying “I’m rubber your glue whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you” is actually kind of true because what you say is a representation of you.

Matthew 15:16-20-“ Jesus replied, “You, too? Are you being willfully stupid? Don’t you know that anything that is swallowed works its way through the intestines and is finally defecated? But what comes out of the mouth gets its start in the heart. It’s from the heart that we vomit up evil arguments, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, lies, and cussing. That’s what pollutes. Eating or not eating certain foods, washing or not washing your hands—that’s neither here nor there.”

Proverbs 21:23- “Watch your tongue and keep your mouth shut, and you will stay out of trouble”

Proverbs 18:21-“The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.”

If you have nothing but negative things to say, or purposefully pick people apart to make yourself feel better you should probably pray for a clean heart. God already knows you’re a mess on the inside and he longs to make you whole. Because the tongue has the power of death and life choose to speak life over people and if you don’t have anything positive to say to anyone don’t say anything at all. And Ladies referring to yourselves as anything less than a Woman or a Lady is not cute and it needs to stop. Stay Blessed

Why I dont believe in Karma

 Whenever a person is wronged in some way, the first thing “mature people” say is “I am going to let karma do my dirty work.” I am starting to learn that that is just a bitter response and all it does is store up bitterness in our hearts. We hold on to what they did and hope they get what they deserve for wronging us. When in reality we just remain hurt thinking about what they did every night and depend on Karma to get the job done. I’ve seen that happen so much its actually sad. I’ve heard about women praying that their former boyfriends will lose their jobs or something bad will happen to them. If you have that much unforgiveness and bitterness in your heart, its time to start praying for a heart that wants to forgive and move on.

“God’s law was given so that all people could see how sinful they were. But as people sinned more and more, God’s wonderful grace became more abundant. “ Romans 5:20

Where sin abounds Grace abounds that much more. So why is it that when we sin we pray for forgiveness and Gods Grace is sufficient enough to forgive us but when someone sins against us we do not realize that God’s Grace is sufficient for them too? Gods Grace overthrows Karma any day, want to know how I know? 

Well lets get into the story of Jesus’s Crucifixion:

We all know Jesus died for our sins but did you ever stop and think about how hurt Jesus was by the hands of his own friends that day. No one can hurt you as bad as those who are closest to you, we all know that. First, Judas sold him out for 30 pieces of silver. I think everyone has gotten into it with someone over money or betrayed their friends over some dollars. Now although Judas was not the closest to Jesus, he was still his disciple who wanted to follow Jesus wherever he went. We’ve all had that one friend that claimed to have our back but only ended up stabbing us in the back.

Second, When Jesus got arrested ALL the disciples ran.
^“Jesus said to the mob, “Why do you come with swords and clubs to arrest me like a criminal? Day after day I sat and taught in the temple, and you didn’t arrest me. But all this happened, so that what the prophets wrote would come true.”All of Jesus' disciples left him and ran away.” (Matthew 26:55-56) ... Ever been ditched by your friends? 


Third, Peter denied him three times. Now we all have a best friend, Whenever you read the scripture you see Peters name right next to Jesus. Peter was the closest to Jesus, Peter is the modern day best friend. Now, if I was about to die a wrongful death and my best friend denied me I would be beyond hurt and upset.

Fast forward to the resurrection:
“When they entered the tomb, they saw, a young man clothed in a white robe sitting on the right side. The woman were shocked but the Angel said, “Don’t be alarmed. You are looking for Jesus of Nazareth, who was crucified. He isn’t here! He is risen from the dead! Look, this is where they laid his body. Now go and tell his disciples, including Peter, that Jesus is going ahead of you to Galilee. You will see him there, just as he told you before he died.”  (Mark 16:5-7)
According to Karma, they should have suffered something horrendous but they didn’t. Notice how the Angel said “including Peter” To let Peter know he is still Gods child because of grace and forgiveness. Peter was responsible for the ultimate betrayal denying Jesus but if you read on in the bible after these events Peter is responsible for preaching on the day of Pentecost to the masses in Jerusalem after Christ’s ascension into heaven. (Acts 2) He was also known as one of the greatest preachers, responsible for saving over 8,000 people.  


I say all of that to say this, instead of focusing on when someone else is going to get what they deserve, focus on making yourself a better person and pray for a pure and tender heart. You’re the only one suffering when your focused on someone elses Karma. I am not saying go out and purposely sin because Gods grace is going to cover you because that’s not how it works. We also have to stop thinking that whenever we do something good we are going to get some type of reward. News flash, we are supposed to do good to others not because we want some blessing or reward but because we have a heart that wants to see others blessed. God knows our hearts anyway but we have to watch our motive behind why we do things we can’t expect all blessings to be monetary or financial.

Peace & Blessings

Fun fact about the picture above :

Located on the eastern side of Mount Zion, St. Peter in Gallicantu Church was built in 1931 over the spot where Peter denied knowing Christ. It's also the site of Caiaphas' palace where Jesus was brought to trial. The name, "Gallicantu" means "the cock's crow" and is taken from the event when Peter denied knowing Jesus three times, as the cock crowed each time.

Believing vs. Acknowleding

Do you believe in God or do you acknowledge his existence? This may sound like the same question but in reality they are both completely different.

There are many people who identify as Christian and acknowledge his existence. They go to church when they are feeling down, pray when they want things to work out in their favor and call on God when they need something. By acknowledging God’s existence they are accepting the truth that he is Real. But as long as this real God ain’t messin up their plans to live life the way they want to live life, which is on their own terms, they are good. These are the people you usually see wasted at parties, cursin up a storm whenever you see them, gossipin, having sex with every other person they meet, don’t care whose feelings they hurt cause they are going to say whatever they need to say but then got the nerve to be on twitter talking about  “Thank God for waking me up this morning.” Or “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”

 “Why do you call me ‘Lord, Lord,’ and not do what I tell you? (Luke 6:46)

Those are the same people who call on God to get them out of a desperate situation. They werent concerned about calling on him when they were doing things their way.

I feel like every person knows someone who only calls them when they need something and that is one of my biggest pet peeves. Seriously it is. But it’s the same thing with God how upset do you think he is when we call on him only when we need things to go our way, or get a certain job, or run fast in our next race.

And then there are believers/followers of Christ. Whose daily lives reflect their belief in God. They know to  acknowledge God in all that they do, seek his face in daily prayer because they know God is in control. They know that they are not the master of their own Fate. You don’t see them purposefully pursuing sin because they are dead to it. They know because they are saved they are a new creation in Christ. 

“Therefore if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come; The old has gone, the new is here!” (2 Corinthians 5:17)

They don’t live life for themselves. The bigger picture is eternity. I am in no way saying that followers of Christ are perfect in every way. But instead of following the worlds example of how a Man or Woman should be, or listening to what the media is telling them. They follow the one example, Christ.

But wait…. There are also people who don’t line up with the two categories I described. They don’t particularly participate in all the activities described above, have great hearts but don’t necessarily have a relationship with God. Or maybe they claimed to have gotten saved when they were seven. That’s great and all but you don’t get salvation because you have a good Heart that doesn’t know God. I am not going to even entertain the notion when people who say to me “Yeah, I’m having sex but God knows my heart.” “One day I’ll go to church and get saved.” Your right God does know your heart, He knows your lying, sinful heart and guess what Going to church doesn’t make you saved.

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. (Matthew 7:21)

Before you sit here and think you’re being judged you’re not. What I’m saying is we are ALL sinners and we ALL need him. I want you to ask yourself which category do you fall under? There is a God who loves and wants nothing but the best for us, all you have to do is Obey. Do you want to obey the world, obey  yourself or obey a God who will provide you with all you can ask for and much more?

The choice is yours

Healing and Avoiding Heartbreak

Before I begin speaking about healing, we must realize that there is no magic formula for healing or avoiding heartbreak. You will not heal over night. Healing is a process you have to recognize your hurt and identify the source it comes from.  Sometimes God will allow you to hit rock bottom before you can start to heal. Before hitting rock bottom, you feel a tugging on your spirit. Telling you to leave before it gets worse but you stay ignoring that feeling, thinking that you are over-thinking. Well that tugging is nothing but the good ol’ holy spirit.

                A lot of us choose to hide our hurt. Masking it with a smile and never properly healing from it. Sweeping it under the rug and allowing it to come back as bitterness, when the mere thought of it rears its ugly head. We think we are so in control when we get hurt. If we are so in control of our emotions why do we make impulsive decisions when we are hurt like go and get a tattoo to signify that this will never happen again (and it does), dye your hair, retail therapy (spending money you don’t have), or getting a weird piercing. It is just a tactic to show we are in control when really we aren’t. I am not saying that it is wrong to do any of these things but when we do it to fill a void, it’s something you’ll end up regretting.  Here is what I am saying; We must learn to forgive and not allow hurt to control our lives.  

                It may seem impossible to forgive the person that hurt you. Every time you think about their repulsive actions toward you thinking how could they do that to me? Etc. But you must realize that all things are possible through Christ. Realize that God can and wants to fix your broken heart. “he heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” (Psalms 147:3)

                Just remember you play a huge role in a play called healing. Stop moping around, stop playing what happened over and over in your head. Stop dwelling and throwing the past back in your own face. That’s like eating your own throw up. Are you a dog? Didn’t think so. Your starting a huge fight in your head and your heart. Healing and becoming whole in Christ is a serious matter. How do you expect to live a worthy life if you can not forgive. “Lord how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him?” As many as seven times. Jesus said I do not say to you seven times but seventy times seven.” (Matthew 18:21-22)

                After you choose to forgive bless and pray for that person. “Bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.” (Luke 6:28) I know your thinking, “Hold up, wait a minute, pump the breaks, This person basically crushed my heart and expect me to pray for them?” Yes I do and not only do I expect you to do it, God expects you to do it. This is exactly how you avoid bitterness. Bitterness does nothing for you. When your praying ask God for deliverance and freedom from whatever your situation may be. “Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. And whenever you stand praying,forgive if you have anything against anyone, so that your father also who is heaven may forgive you.” (Mark 11:24-25)

                Think of it like this you don’t want to die, get to the pearly gates and God say “turn from me I never knew you.” And just like that your banished to hell because you did not forgive some person who hurt your feelings. Ask yourself “Is it really worth your eternity?” It is awesome to forgive but don’t be a door-mat. I am a Christian not a fool, I wont let you walk all over me. I will love you from a distance and pray God blesses you. So when you spend time with God lay your hurt pain and unforgiveness at his feet. You cannot do this by yourself. Point Blank. With man it is impossible but with God all things are possible.

How to avoid Hurt and Heart Break in every relationship

1.)    Turn the relationship over to God. If he is the foundation of your relationship, then that is a strong relationship.

2.)    Set some Standards. Many of the times we think we have standards because the person we are dating is above 6 feet. True. That is not a standard. If you guys are courting set the standard of waiting until you are married. If it is just a friendship establish boundaries, keep certain things private. People like to use what you said in privacy in a public fight.

3.)    Is it pushing you closer to Christ? Any relationship that pushes you closer to Christ is going to be a challenge. Their going to push you to pray harder and get closer to God. Remember some people are comfortable with where you are in your walk with Christ. They can handle the fact that you go to church on Sundays and have your quality time with God but are good with you still going to the club with them. If you want to go higher you have to drop certain things.

4.)    TEST EVERYTHING THEY SAY. “But test everything; cling to what is good.” (1^st Thessolonians 5:21) Ask God to show you their hearts and their motives. Believe him when he shows you. Ask him for discernment, he gives us common sense for a reason.

5.)    “and all their intellectual arrogance that oppose the knowledge of God. We take every thought captive so that it is obedient to Christ.” (2 cor 10:5) We must cast down our imaginary thoughts. Females in general have the tendency to play out an entire love story in our heads all because the cute cook at McDonalds said hi.

6.)    “Guard your heart above all else; for it determines the course of your life.” (Proverbs 4:23) This speaks for it self and goes along with number 5 also. You got to stay away from the music that tells you that Love is found in sex. And if you know a person is bad news stay away. I honestly do not feel bad if I tell a person to dismiss themselves from my life. Like I said before I am not a doormat. If it is in Gods will they will come back. You have a part to play in every aspect of your life you do not just become a victim because of someone else. Overlooking warning signs and not guarding your heart is something that we fail at because we don’t take accountability for our actions.

Jesus forgave those who beat him, pierced him, broke his arm, put a crown of thorns on his head, crucified him and killed him. All the while he still prayed for them. During your healing process focus on how much better your going to be after this. How nothing will be able to touch you, youll be able to recognize so much when it is over. So cliché but think of how beautiful the sun shines after a terrible storm.

The Self-worth Struggle

                Have you ever struggled with self-worth? Have you been constantly comparing yourself to women or men on Television or social media sites? Have you ever tried something and quit because you did not feel qualified or good enough? Is that voice in the back of your head constantly telling you, your not pretty, you cannot compete with her/him, you’ll never get that job. Have you ever stayed in a relationship that you knew was bad because that person makes you feel like you matter or your worth something? Well if you have said yes to any of these questions then this is for you.

                First, let’s get into what exactly Self-worth is. It is defined as dignity, the quality of being worthy of esteem or respect. Have you ever seen a girl who constantly refers to herself as the baddest B or goes out on weekends with the skimpiest outfits on just to get some attention. She won’t say out loud that she finds self-worth in men who “holla” at her and women who stare at her out of jealousy but she does. When she gets home at night and changes her clothes and realizes that there is no one there to give her attention she will most likely go on a social network and post a picture just for someone to compliment her, so she can feel good. This my friend, is a classic case of high self-esteem and low self-worth. Or the man who finds value in his self by how many girls he can get, he is willing to play whoever whenever. Not even keeping in mind whose heart he is hurting along the way. Or the man who finds value in athletics, nothing will get in the way of his game not even spending time with God. Another classic case of no self-worth.

We should not find value in things that can be taken away so easily. Instead of finding your worth in a man, turn to the one who Loves you for you and believes your worthy to share his kingdom in heaven and that is God. It says in Isaiah 2:22, “Do not put your trust in mere humans they are as frail as breath what good are they?”  People are as frail as breath why should we put them on this pedestal to make us feel good about ourselves. Many people struggle with self-worth because they do not know who they are. Well look to the one who made you. “So God created mankind in his own image. In the image of God he created them: male and female he created them.” (Genesis 1:27) So if we were created in his image then why wouldn’t our Identities be found in Christ? If we know that our identity is found in Christ we should not have to look at TV, media, social networks to find out who we are. But when secular music is your bible and who you answer to when your day is bad or good your unconsciously using that as the standard to live your life to. So no wonder you don’t feel good about yourself you think your supposed to be a dime, that’s 5’5 with green eyes, caramel complexion and a busty figure. But in reality your about 5’7 with a slim frame and skin the color of a hersheys bar. Now I am not saying that any of this is ugly because it is not we are all made in his image. Women are not the only ones who use the world as their standard of living, men do too. With music telling men they don’t mean much unless they are surrounded by plenty of women or the television shows that are basically saying if someone is not competing for you then your not doing much with your life. When you listen to the world your using that as a standard of living, beauty and worth and you don’t even realize it. 

“If you cling to your life you will lose it but if you lose your life you will find it.” (Matthew 10:39)

I am not writing this blog to say that if you look pretty you have low self-worth what I am saying is find your worth in the one who loves you so much that he laid down his life for you. Does that person or thing you find value in love you so much that it will lay down his life for you? I think not. If you know you have low self-worth, pour your heart out at the feet of Jesus. Pray and ask him to heal you and make you whole. He is the only one who is capable of making you feel whole, he breathes life into you everyday. He gives us life, why would he not complete us and make us feel like we are worth something. Have you ever had a horrible day and once you told someone about it you felt better? Well bring your problems to God, you can be completely honest (He already knows the truth) and he will still accept you and Love you because he created you. You cannot say this about people today, many people will judge you and give you a side eye even the ones closest to you.

“A worthy wife is a crown for her husband, but a disgraceful woman is like cancer in his bones” (Prov 12:4) If your not married, be a crown for your husband who is Jesus, look good, wear your best outfits because you are representing the most high. Crowns are meant to be shown off. If you want to strengthen your self-worth, drop the magazine that is telling you to lose 10 inches off of your waist, stop listening to the music that tells you your not beautiful and turn off the television shows that are glorifying fighting and bringing other women and men down. Turn away from that guy that makes you feel like your not good enough because he wants to be with other people and turn away from that woman who is causing your life to take a drastic spiral downwards. Turn to the man who created you. “And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid, you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows.” (Matthew 10:30-31)

Now once I can find something that knows the amount of hairs on my head I will put my value in it but until that day comes, I will continue to find my worth in the Lord. As my walk with the Lord gets stronger, frivolous things that I use to find value in do not define me anymore. “Don’t waste what is holy on people who are unholy. Don’t throw your pearls to pigs! They will trample the pearls, then turn and attack you.” (Matthew 7:6) I now realize how valuable I am as a child of God, I didn’t know this before so I pray that even if just one person reads this, they will realize their worth and turn from their old ways and put their everything in to Christ.